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This TOS is directly based off a certain chatting service TOS. A lot of these are genuine points made in the TOS, just either exaggerated or adding parts that are hidden with bigger words just to throw one off.
For example, the TOS I based it off mentioned that they “have the right, but not the obligation, to review such reports and block or remove content at our discretion.” In my TOS, I reworded it to say they have the right to review and remove content, but it doesn’t mean they’ll use it. I made it so that this idea wasn’t hidden behind big and fancy words.
I also feel like this parody TOS also does a good job of distracting you from hidden phrases you’d only read if you read in depth- if you were to skim through, you’d likely only see the larger words, like “excellent”, “additionally”, “environment”, and completely avoid the fact that the sentence right after it talks about something less than ideal for a user.
Most people just don’t read the TOS because it’s a huge block of text, which I think this TOS does slightly. I’m sure there could be more than this, like legal terms and stuff, but even if it’s not the largest block of text, it’s still enough to encourage someone not to read it.